misplaced mama

Isn’t a place to party with your friends.

That’s the first sentence that caught my eye after being hand delivered an invitation for redemption.  A stranger approaches me in my driveway the other night while i am taking Sula out of the car.  "Hello ma’am." I am about to tell him we don’t need any tree maintenance, that my husband will do it someday himself.  But instead he tells me he personally invites me to join him in in the wonder of salvation.  I smile.  I am exhausted and cranky and to smile is the only way I can relieve my desire to not to say something totally rude.   I glance at the paper and see the above sentence.  Hell is not a place to party with your friends.  I look at him and say, "Everywhere is a place to party with my friends." He opens his mouth ready to deliver words but  I just giggle, nuzzle Sula in her glorious neck, feel utterly saved by her sweet smelling flesh, and I walk into my house.

 I settle down with a cup of tea and read this flyer he passed on, printrd in blood red ink.

WEEPING WAILING GNASHING OF TEETH  will TORMENT ME FOREVER if I don’t accept Jesus as my Savior.  I dunno, is it just me or does that sound like a threat?

THERE IS NO CHANCE OF EVER GETTING OUT—ETERNAL PUNISHMENT! Now that’s commitment.

Did I know I was the GREATEST DANGER that exists in the universe?  No shit? Little old me when there is a big old war going on? 

WARNING:YOU will be thrown in this ETERNAL FIRE! AND YOU WILL BURN! Ouch.  But hey, I’ve lived through 3 Phoenix summers.

The invite conveniently listed who "I" was; the person being invited to walk the Jesus road:The sexually immoral, practicing magical arts, a drunkard, a homo, a follower of evil, a murderer, greedy, deceived by the "new age movement", worshiper of idols.  Um, well, okay.  Sure.  Maybe a few.

Did I know that Hell IS NOT JUST FOR HITLER AND CHARLES MANSON, BUT FOR….ME.  Seriously? 

Did I know that the bible is THE FINAL AUTHORITY and that NO OTHER BOOK, such as the Koran, Book of Mormon, Bhagavad-Gita will save me?  Did I know I CANNOT be saved through Mother Mary, The 10 Commandments, or being a "good person" that there is no redemption for being kind if you do not FORSAKE SINS and TRUST CHRIST 100%?  Did I know there was only ONE PATH to ETERNAL LIFE and that was through JESUS to the FATHER?  I don’t claim to know a damn thing.

The flyer came designed with a lovely illustration of hell, people all naked, and screaming, and crying and and burning up in flames. Don’t let this happen to you! It warned.

Looks like I am a peace train to hell. 

 I was brought of Christian.  Roman Catholic.  But I was nursed my whole life with the belief that Christ was Love.  That God was Love. Granted, Catholicism is heavy in the idea that their organized religion was the only way into "Heaven", but in my house, there was no talk about the pits of Hell.  I was taught to be kind, nonjudgmental and loving; those were the roots my mother used and those stuck. I don’t buy into any dogma what so ever. As a matter of fact, my goal is to destroy all dogma.  Completely be gone with it.  Dogma that surrounds birth, life and death should be wiped away from minds and hearts.  Love needs no dogma.  Love brings freedom; and true love and passion for oneself spreads to each person we encounter.  True love heals.  Dogma separates.

My own personal vision of Christ was that of an avatar of love, if he was anything at all.  A teacher of the mystical ways, a guide for the teachings love; Unity, Compassion, Selflessness, Transcendence.  I remember being taught that in love the means and the ends are one in the same; we only get their by loving.  Not hating.  This is highly treaded ground here, but I will be another to say it: this bullshit is not Christ Consciousness.  It can’t be.  Jesus would not hand out fliers like that. 

This flyer, which part of me wishes I could scan and post here, because I know a lot of people who would get a good laugh and some a good cry and some will judge me for critiquing this method of missioning, but I already put it under flame in my backyard and watched it transform to nothing but ash.    Before I burned it I really listened to why I was given it.  Was I meant to be angered?  To convert? I actually saw that flyer as a blessing, reminding me of who I truly am.  I live and bring my children up on the faith of spontaneous happiness and joy. This invitation to "freedom and salvation" did it’s job for me;  it makes me want to smile bigger, open my heart wider, and rise above this particular Christian manifestation of Hell on Earth, because that is where hell dwells; this place right here in front of us, inside us; it’s where we hate, judge, and abuse.  It’s where we limit our love.  But it can be Heaven too, if we want it to be.  This harsh and at best, ridiculious message, is a tool to swing my pendulum more closely towards acceptance and co-existence. Because I am forced to look at that man with compassion.  Regardless of what he is doing (invading my privacy with hogwash) I don’t invite him to walk my path.  I don’t wish hell upon him for believing in a dogma that I see as simply destructive.   Back in the day, if I were to receive something like this I most likely would have cursed the guy out, getting into an heated argument about what hypocrisy there is in the Christian movement.  I would have debated paganism until I was blue in the face.  Or I would have dressed in black, draped myself in my red velvet cloak for kicks and passed out some of my own hand-made literature to the folks at The Good Shepard Church (the particular establishment which created these fliers).  But not now.  I mean is anything worth forcing down someone’s throat?  I don’t know what I believe, except that I believe in Love. And I believe listening for love is more powerful than talking about it.

I spent some time pressing my heart closer to my "enemy", the circle of energy that believes in threats and fear to draw people to a faith. I truly sending this entity love, acceptance, and light.  I am doing it right now, actually seeing life force enter me through all sides, feeling it’s positive power and then sending it back outside of me.  I send it towards space which seems dark and empty, lonely.  II pass it through  energy blocks formed by self-loathing and anger.  That man thought I needed to be saved, and as he extended this literature to me, he did his job.  I grow stronger and larger and lighter in my body and work on becoming a  pure vessel of energy.  A person who longs to never push dogma into someones hand, but just lend a hand.  I am on a long road and I have tons to learn, but this man was a teacher for me.  A spark to remind me what my purpose here on Earth is.  So I thank that man.  I love him. I hope that someday we can party in heaven together.

Blessed be!