Odent IS NOT a crackpot.
Here is a movie review for The Business of Being Born. I respect her choice to give it a rather negative review, dismissing it as important for our current birth culture. Although I don’t agree with her that documentaries should be unbiased and objective. I mean, they are called documentaries to document experience. Nobody said it’s “the news” (ha! Like the news is even close to being objective). And I hardly felt that Lake’s movie suggested that homebirth is the right choice for everyone. She just gave homebirth a voice that it craves. I personally do find that Lake’s film may in some ways feed the Fear Factor a bit for women who may have never even thought of the world of birthing in this way. I think dramatic plays on the horrors of what happens in hospitals, whether coming from a Baby Story episode or Lake’s documentary is not the way to inform women on birthing choices, which Stevens (the critic) makes note of.
But to call Michel Odent a crackpot? Hold me back…I’m swingin’ at her for that one.
I really try to keep my birth talk, my birth writing personal. I/We (my family) personally chooses homebirth. I do so because this is what my body tells me is right and good and safe for us. Before I even got pregnant, I was given a glimpse through my immediate community what it was like to birth in both homes and hospitals. I could compare stories, read up on the subject, talked to care providers..etc. I was a lucky one, for some reason I stumbled upon enough information and evidence based education. I also fostered a deep intuition that birthing would need to be private and holistic for me in order for it to be safe and empowering. My decision came easily, and immediately I fell into a supportive system.
I do not think that homebirth is the right choice for everyone. It’s absolutely not. Nothing is an absolute in life. Everyone walks different paths. Breastfeeding is not right for everyone. Co-Sleeping is not the answer for all. Clothe? Disposable? Who knows except you? Nobody. There are a million other choices one could make in parenting and there are no rules, we need to find our own path. To think one way or another is ‘better’ is just ignorant. And propagandist. For myself, homebirth is beyond words a way for me to bring peace on this earth, because it brings peace to myself and my little circle of family. I like that quote by Gandhi that so many people share: Be the change you wish to see in the world. Not once in there does he say preach the change. Being the change means exactly that. I homebirth because I want to see the change happen: in myself. I do not expect others to make the same choices as I do.
But sharing information is not preaching. Women deserve to be handed a wide variety of literature and support. We need to ask ourselves: Do all women understand the slippery slope of medical interventive births? Do all women know that homebirthing without drugs is intense, wild and sometimes ends up in needed transfers and sometimes non-vaginal birth? Do all women understand exactly what epidurals do to the fetus? Do all women know that OB’s must take, on average, 30 clients a month to pay their malpractice insurance and perhaps the rate of inductions and scheduling is not in the best interest of the mother and baby, but a simple necessity of the doctor (30 births a month is impossible to attend if mother is left to birth on her own). Do all women know that the hospitals would not survive without the ‘interventive’ birthing industry (including anesthetic and surgeries and pharmaceutical outfits..etc). Do all women understand the birth is not a guarantee? Women and babies do die, as in life? Do they understand that no matter where one births, there is risk? Do they know that moving in birth and positions other than laying down can help babies come out? Do they understand that sometimes drugs can help a women birth her baby more safely than not? Are they prepared to accept that birth might not be what they thought it was going to be? Each woman who prepares to birth needs to hear it all. Informed choices equal power.
There will always be a divide between birthing practices. We argue the esoterics and ethics and medical reasons for either or. But until we all are offered an array of information, we are marginalized and fall prey to propaganda. On either side.
What a women needs is love and support. Offerings of gentle information and people to hold her space safe; to allow her to experience the vastness of pregnancy and birth, whether she feels safe in the comfort of a doctor, or a midwife, or on her own. Each woman needs the respect to make decisions based on her body wisdom. All women need to be encouraged that they are indeed FULL of body wisdom, and their babies share in that space. Women need to be held and encouraged to listen to themselves. When a woman listens to herself and her baby, makes choices for herself and her baby, regardless of what they are, she deserves respect in her community, from her care providers, from her culture. There is a saying…mother knows best. It starts when the baby is in the womb.
I get annoyed when people try to passively and aggressively tell me it’s dangerous to have my baby in my home, just as I get annoyed when people claim that homebirthing is best and safest choice. I just listened to my body wisdom, my subtle whispering soul, the one that wants me to grow and expand. That voice, for me, led me to stay at home. If my body whispered to me that another place, such as a hospital, was where I needed to be, then that is where I would be. And on top of listening to myself, I was blessed: I knew I had choices. I know I could be at home and I knew it was safe for me to do so.
I didn’t personally think The Business of Being Born was the greatest documentary in the world. but for goodness sake’s she is trying, she is trying to get the word out there so women understand they have choices, all kinds of choices. There are doctors and hospitals on every corner, filling up chunks of the Yellow Pages. We know we can go there and they are so easy to find, but do all of us know what we might encounter when we birth there? And in some places finding a midwife to attend your birth at home can be hard to find, and once we do, do we know what it could be like to labor for 3 days at home with no drugs? Are we ready for that? All of us may not know that homebirth IS safe, and so Ricki Lake shares information that allows us to understand that is indeed is. It is safe. The rest of our culture is quite sure the other alternatives are better. Let a little homebirth voice be heard.
And again Odent is NOT a crackpot. It is a shame she put that down as words. He really is a gift. But that’s just my little opinion. His waterbirth work probably was a reason I was able to have one. And to birth without water for me is like living without air.
(Okay, I am going back to being a mushy headed, emotional pregnant woman, soaking in her birth tub, drinking Lime Seltzer Water and reading silly magazines.)
Thanks so much for this post. That review bothered me, but I couldn’t find the words to express why. Your words are well-written and dead-on.
Comment by Heather — January 17, 2008 @ 1:57 am
I could not have said it better myself. Each woman must decide what is best for her. And it must be an INFORMED decision, which very few are truly informed, in my opinion. So few women know what they are signing up for when they decide on a hospital birth. People think I’m crazy for wanting a homebirth and ask, “What about the pain?” They fail to realize that birth is about so much more than pain (or the lack of it). So much more. And how wonderful it would be if we were all encouraged and supported in our efforts to look within and hear that quiet voice in our hearts. Sadly, it just doesn’t happen that often.
Comment by gearhead mama — January 17, 2008 @ 3:11 am
just had to come out lurkdom to say, “amen!!”
thank you for perfectly articulating my thoughts regarding birth that i often feel i can’t express coherently to others (once i get more sleep maybe it will come a little easier!)…
on a side note or two, welcome to the pacific nw! (i’m in pt. twnsnd) also, three children in the family is crazy, fun, chaotic, hilarious and sometimes drives me to drink…and i wouldn’t have it any other way. i love it. can’t wait to “meet” your little one soon…
Comment by katie — January 17, 2008 @ 6:25 am
MB, you blew me with this post. Incredibly well-written. I so agree!
Checking in daily to see whether the youngest of your family members has been born yet. So exciting!
Comment by Sanne — January 17, 2008 @ 7:16 pm
As you know, you influenced me (by your actions not your preaching, which you don’t do) to have my baby at home. Of course, with my 10lb 4oz baby and this first time mama, it didn’t work out, and I ended up having a c-section after 24 hours in labor and pushing for 3 hours. Anyway, I did all my prenatal care with midwives and got a glimpse of the wonderful, supportive, safe and nurturing environment of home birth. I also glimpsed the fear-based judgment coming from others when they asked me “what hospital” I was giving birth in and I told them I was birthing “at home.” This coming from a lawyer in a corporate law firm. Ha. It just made me more convinced by my decision (which I in no way regret). I am always skeptical when there is such a bias against something about which people know so little about. Birth is such a personal experience, it offends me that others would purport to know best how you should birth your baby. Come on. That said, I was damn thankful for a c-section when I needed one, and I honor the skill and training it required to bring Emilio into this world. And I love my scar. You’re right, it’s all about being informed about your options, because there are OPTIONS. I hate soap boxes. Amen. Now, what about that little Dove….?
Comment by Courtney Alban — January 17, 2008 @ 7:37 pm
what a wonderfully provocative and inspired writing. Your passion burns off the page, or screen as it may be.
I have not seen the film so I can’t comment on that.
To respond to what you wrote however, I am right there with you on women having choice and that there is no right choice. Your words gave me chills. So powerful.
Fear is lurking beneath propaganda on either “side” and in this very notion of sides. Of course every woman wants to choose a safe birth. And what this means for one is different than what this means for another. In any choice we are all doing the best we can.
Choice is also not control. And I think that is is often what is being sought: certainty, guarantees, illusive and unattainable control over what is mystery.
How much things would change if the energy spent in disagreement and criticism was rather given to honoring women for finding their own way as they birth, moment by moment, rising to what is needed which cannot be known until we arrive there.
Comment by bella — January 17, 2008 @ 10:33 pm
Courtney,
I think you bring up such an interesting point (knowing your warrior story and the birth you experienced I feel I can say this). You felt honored throughout the EXPERIENCE, the attention you were given, the respect the midwives shared with you. I know that your actually “birth” did not happen the way you originally thought, but it happened they way it did, in the safest manner possible. And although you had planned the birth to be at home, your baby led you to where it needed to be born. And throughout the process, you were respected. Maybe that is a clue in supporting a mother-baby based birth culture…not such an ‘outcome’ based culture (i.e. how and where baby will be born) but a journey based culture, where each women is held and loved while the mystery of birth falls upon her lap, exactly how it was intended to.
I love you sister…will call when knocks on my gate!
MB
Comment by misplacedmama — January 17, 2008 @ 10:56 pm
Well put! I actually forwarded a few paragraphs of your post to my husband in response to the review you mentioned (that he emailed to me a couple days ago) you wrote what I wanted to say, but couldn’t put into words. It pisses me off that any view outside of the mainstream is automatically seen as propaganda instead of just much needed information… Every woman deserves to have ALL the information - good and bad, boring and scary, when it comes to something as important as where and how to bring a child into the world…
Thinking of you as your new little one prepares for his/her journey to this earth…
Comment by Chelsea — January 18, 2008 @ 12:44 am
Great post! I’ve even included it in my weekly blogroll post. Kudos, mama. And I’m sure you are NEVER mushy headed! LOL
Blessings!
Comment by Tori @ PunkinPockets — January 19, 2008 @ 12:34 am